Jun 6, 2009

"Full Immersion is a bitch"

or, how i almost lost my new sister.

Well, as i wrote yesterday, each girl needs her own treatment, what is right for one can be wrong for the other one. Misty showed so much potential that Mistress thought that Full Immersion, i.e. tossing her right into the water to teach her swimming, would be the right method to teach her.

Well no-one, not even Mistress is all-knowing, and what She didn't know was that misty is not really stress-resistant: when the stress gets too big, and she doesn' t know whats happening, she begins to panic.
And this happened at a place full of other Doms and slaves.
A technical glitch (maybe lag, maybe just SL playing games) prevented misty from kneeling beside Mistress and of course she got scolded. But instead of saying, "please excuse me, Mistress, i don't know what is going on, please can i relog?" she began to defend herself - which made a Dom's look at the situation change from "poor girl suffering SL glitches" to "disobediant girl seeking excuses", and of course started to anger Mistress.
So, I was sent home and had to tp misty there. Here i tried to talk to misty but she was on a roll, which is understandable after a certain time spent in SL, full of lessons to learn and stuff. She was tired, stressed-out, and felt treated unjust.
Well i could relate but i also felt responsible: Both we are slaves of Mistress and when one of us does wrong, it's not "misty" or "gem" - it's "one of Lexi's girls" wo does the mistake.
I'm sorry but i did not work that hard for that long time to learn to be the best slave i can be, only to be now judged for my sisters mistakes by generalization.
I like misty, she's fun to be around, chatty and intelligent, polite and easy to be friend with, and i'm sure i can learn as much from her as she can learn from me - and i do know that its not easy to learn to be a slave - but i think it was her own fault to become so stressed out. She is the person who MUST say "please slower down a bit", or "i need a break", or "here is a border i do not want to cross now". When she doesn't tell, how can Mistress know when the point of too much is reached? Mistress might be many things but She's not a clairvoyant. At least not usually. So i also talked to misty and tried to explain things and i was so disappointed when she was like that. The "poor me"-game doesn't match misty at all. It's soo not HER.

Gosh i really was afraid when Mistress came and told us to bide and talked to misty - and misty could not leave her roll of defending herself, as full of self-consciousness and the wish to do everything right as she was. When Mistress then said "Go, misty" and "gem you are dismissed to do as you please", i was so sad and afraid that it meant misty had to leave us, that i started to cry in RL, and more so when misty came to me to talk - and suddenly Mistress messaged me to tell misty, that she should go to Her if she wanted collar release. Collar Release - the word even i fear: to be released from the collar, to be disowned, abandoned.

Phew, nothing so evil happened.

Misty asked Mistress to keep her, to give her another chance. So she still is my sister - and after a long, long talk between us girls (through all the night, until sunrise) i know misty will not leave us deliberately, and will do her best to prevent herself from too much stress to avoid panicking again.

Misty, i love you too and i am happy for both reasons: that i have a sister again, and that this sister is you. you can't even imagine how much i would have missed you despite the short time we know each other.

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